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What is Sacred Sexuality?

I use this term quite a bit and perhaps you may be wondering what exactly does she mean by Sacred Sexuality?

Excellent question! I think I have somewhat taken it for granted that people will know what I mean when I say this, but, upon reflection, am realizing that this is not necessarily true - so let's dig into it a bit and shed some light.

I recognize that utilizing the word "sacred" in regards to sexuality is a bit unorthodox in this Christian-dominated society we've grown up in and who, for the most part and in general, tends to shun and shame the body and is not exactly what we would consider the most sex-positive organization. Quite the contrary - it has widely perverted and distorted our beautiful God-given bodies and sexual expression. The word "sacred" is something that is usually used by religious people to describe something to do with their religion.

In looking up the term sacred, I found the following that stood out to me:

From ~ Sacred, the power, being, or realm understood by religious persons to be at the core of existence and to have a transformative effect on their lives and destinies. Other terms, such as holy, divine, transcendent, ultimate being (or ultimate reality), mystery, and perfection (or purity) have been used for this domain. “Sacred” is also an important technical term in the scholarly study and interpretation of religions.

Considered to be holy and deserving respect, especially because of a connection with a god:

Connected with religion:

Considered too important to be changed.

Given these definitions, it is easy to see why one would not associate the word "sacred" with sexuality, given all the references to religion - and it is also easy to see why one would.

Though I do not subscribe to any particular religion (I consider myself to be spiritual, not religious), I do consider our sexual energy and expression to be "holy, divine, transcendent, a mystery, and perfection" and can definitely be an experience of "ultimate reality" for us. Given that each of us comes into being from the beauty of the sexual act between two human beings, sexuality and our sexual energy is most definitely at "the core of existence" for us - and we all know the "transformative effect on our lives and destinies" that our sexuality and sexual attraction to another has on our lived experience.

I most certainly consider our sexuality "to be holy and deserving respect" - our sexual energy and expression is the most powerful force in our lives - bringing us into this world and driving the majority of our passions, interactions, creativity, desires, motivations, and paths through life.

"Considered too important to be changed" - this is a huge one and rather thought-provoking given the context of this conversation, as much of what I am so passionate about is supporting our return to a healthy sexual expression - given the sexually repressive society that we have grown up in. Many of society's structures and organizations have sought to change the way we experience and express our sexuality, our desire, our passion. Much of this sexual energy has been vilified, demonized, repressed, shunned, shamed, perverted, distorted, capitalized upon, twisted, pathologized, made unlawful, restricted, and just generally fucked up for us for generations upon generations. In other words - "changed." Our experience of our sexuality has most definitely been changed from its original, intended, natural, healthy expression.

I feel fairly confident saying that not one of us has escaped the harmful, repressive effects of all of this. I am yet to meet anybody who isn't working, consciously or unconsciously, with some sort of inhibition, shame or repression regarding some aspect of their sexual expression.

Hence the beauty of the word sacred to describe our sexuality. For me, this is the ultimate reclaiming of the beauty, the naturalness, the perfection, and the divinity of our "God-given" sexual energy and sexual nature. I tend to shy away from using the word "God" too much, as, for me, it is still very much associated with religion and the white-bearded dude in the sky. The fact that is a "dude" at all is a challenge for me. My views, beliefs, and experience of reality are that the masculine and feminine energies are equal and are two parts of a whole - the imbalance of masculine energy has deeply distorted our experience of reality - and has caused us serious challenges.

This idea of "God" as only male is problematic and has seriously contributed to our disconnection from the feminine aspects of ourselves - and from nature. I will save that conversation for a later post though. I am of the mind that absolutely everything happens for a reason and all is absolute, Divine perfection, so that means there was a reason for this imbalance that we experienced - and there is a reason we are now seeing a rise of the feminine energies and coming back to the truth of our nature. I trust that balance between the feminine and masculine is being restored and it is a beautiful experience to be a part of. Such a glorious time to be alive on this stunning planet Earth of ours. A wild ride to be sure!

All of that being said, I've tried to work with other words and phrases - Source, The Universe, The Divine, Reality, God/Goddess, and more - and none of them feel like they hit as deeply as the word God for me. I guess it is just so ingrained into the psyche at this point, so I am working with simply embracing it. Not fully there yet though! Do you struggle with this as well? Finding the right terminology for whatever it is that we intuitively feel is a part of our experience, yet can't put our fingers on it or grasp it or make sense of it in any concrete way? Of course if it is as huge as we intuitively know it to be - it is going to be way beyond anything our human minds can pin down and put words to. It is way beyond words, constructs, philosophies, religions. Those can only help point the way for us. These are the tools we have, blunt and cumbersome as they might be, so we will simply make do with what we've got! God it is then.

Anyway, back to Sacred Sexuality. I believe these bodies we inhabit are a beautiful gift - and that our sexual energy is a beautiful gift - not something to be ashamed of or to hide or to try to repress. Our coming together in union is a gorgeous act of connection and is an expression of the nature of our reality, as understood in Tantric philosophy. The Ultimate Reality is understood to be one unified experience - one field of energy, one consciousness. In order to experience Itself, it splits into two aspects, Shiva - the masculine principle, the energy of pure consciousness - and Shakti - the feminine principle, which is the action, the doing, the creative life-force. Though they are talked about separately, they are inseparable - one cannot exist without the other. Just as heat is an aspect of fire and the two cannot be separated - as wetness is an aspect of water and the two cannot be separated. They are two sides of a coin. And there is no hierarchy.

Everything in our reality expresses this masculine and feminine energy, the polarities or dualities, yet there is no actual separation - and all is yearning to return to the experience of Oneness, of Unity. This is the game that God plays - separating into Many in order to experience Itself and to have the glorious, blissful experience of returning to One. Our desire to connect with the other is our desire to return to our innate knowing of this Ultimate Unity - this Oneness.

Part of the human experience is one of forgetting the truth of this Oneness (of separating into the Many) and of having the adventure of remembering the Ultimate Truth as we move throughout our lives. Of remembering that we are not separate - we are One with Source, with God, with each other. This plays out in our longing for sexual union with another - why it feels sooo amazing to be with another, why it is such a strong drive for so many of us - and why when we are denied this connection, this sexual energy and expression, it feels so painful for us, so restrictive, frustrating, isolating, and so lonely.

It is our nature to connect, to return to Union, to experience Oneness. There are many ways that we do this - many of us experience greater Oneness when we get out into nature, when we are in our creativity and doing something we are passionate about, and when we are feeling deeply connected to friends or family members. And, as discussed here, through sexual union with another.

This is a beautiful aspect of our human experience - not something to be shunned, shamed, or denied. We have been given these amazing human bodies for precisely this experience - to explore this beautiful material world of ours with our senses - to touch, to taste, to see, to hear, to smell. Our bodies are not something to transcend, to deny, or to overcome - they are our vehicle to remember the truth of our spiritual nature, our Oneness, through the experience of our physical senses (which are God). This is God expressing itself in the physical - to have an experience of the physical world (which is also God). To experience bliss and union in these physical bodies (which are, yep, also God).

Our bodies are not a punishment; we have not been "thrown out of the garden" - we ARE the garden! We are living in it - when we remember the truth - that there is no separation, that our bodies ARE an expression of The Divine, that we ARE indeed God made flesh - then we get to live in Heaven on Earth. Heaven is not somewhere out there. It is not a place we are trying to get to - it is a consciousness, a state of mind, a truth that we can live right here, right NOW! And our bodies are the vehicles for our remembering, for our experiencing this Heaven on Earth. When we move out of all of the fear, when we release the unhealthy belief systems, when we stop restricting and repressing our natural life-force energies - our sexual, creative energies, when we stop forcing ourselves into the tiny little boxes society has given us, when we start allowing the truth of our energy to flow - this is when we will start to experience the freedom and true union we long for and innately know we are capable of.

At our core, we intuitively know the truth of our Unity and our Oneness. And this is why we are currently experiencing so much stress, anxiety, discomfort, loneliness, frustration, anger, discontent, disease and isolation - the systems we've grown up in mainly support competition, "othering," war, repression of our natural energies, and denigration of our beautiful human bodies. They do not support the truth of our Oneness. And this is extremely painful for us. Again, this is why we so long for union with another - we long to return to our Truth.

Returning to a comment I made earlier, I absolutely trust that everything happens for a reason, that absolutely everything is God - and that means that even the intense experience of separation we've been in is God. And because it is so intense, it makes the reunion even that much sweeter - it makes our remembering even that much sweeter. There is something exquisite about reclaiming our sexuality as sacred - like a long awaited home-coming. So many of us on the planet are waking up and returning to the truth of our reality - remembering our Oneness. Many of us are remembering the truth of our spiritual nature. The desire to speed the remembering is strengthening. Our longing for more authentic Union is no longer as easy to deny, repress, shove under the rug.

We are waking up in a way never before experienced by humanity. Many cultures and ancient civilizations have prophesied this time. It is a gorgeous time to be alive on this planet. It is an amazing time to be inhabiting a human body! Reclaiming our sexuality and recognizing it as sacred is a huge part of this awakening. Everything is God and that means these bodies of ours are God, our sexual desire is God, our sexual union is God, our sexual, creative life-force energy is God - it is absolutely SACRED - it is one of our most powerful tools for awakening and for remembering the truth of our Oneness with each other.

When we remember the truth of our sexual energy and reclaim the sacredness of it, we start to experience it as so much more than simply physical pleasure. The harmonizing of the masculine and feminine sexual energies is a pathway to experiencing our true spiritual nature - ultimate Love, Bliss, Union. A return to Source within. Again, our bodies are our tools for experiencing and remembering our divinity here on Earth. Our sexual energy, for the most part, lies dormant at the base of our spine awaiting to be awakened. Through various practices and ways of living, we start to align our frequencies in a way that supports the awakening of this energy to move up through the spine into our third eye and crown chakra, returning back to settle into our hearts, opening us to experience ourselves as pure Love, in Unity, Oneness and Wholeness. Once we embrace and embody this and start getting more intentional about aligning our frequencies and awakening this energy, we are going to have an entirely different experience of our reality.

And this is what I am sooo freaking passionate about! Supporting us all to remember, to embrace our gorgeous sensual energies, to reclaim the sacredness of our bodies and of our sexuality. To recognize and honor The Divine within ourselves and within the other. These are stunning expressions of our human experience. And they are why you are here right now reading this - you innately know the truth and the beauty and the sacredness of your sexual energy, your sexual expression and sexual union. And you are ready to step more strongly into it - to reclaim it, Sure blow jobs are awesome. Absolutely, fucking feels great! And, yes, orgasms are amazing. But - you long for something deeper, something richer, a more fulfilling experience of yourself, of Union, of The Divine within. That Heaven on Earth that we were promised. The reason we came here at this specific time in the evolution of humanity's consciousness.

We are capable of sooo much more. Of reaching such new heights. Of such deeper connection. All through our experience of sexuality - of our sacred sexual union.

I thank you for being here on this journey with me. This journey of remembering. Of reclaiming. Of empowerment.

I have recommended a number of powerful books and documentaries to support you in your process. I have a super powerful 12-week intensive Empowered Masculine Total Life Transformation program when you are ready to seriously start embracing all of what I've discussed here. Sensual life-coach anyone? I offer one-on-one guidance sessions and energy restoration sessions when you are ready to upgrade your life and take it all to the next level! Read Testimonials here.

Plus, I have my Sacred one-on-one sensual encounters to support a richer experience and exploration of sacred union. And we will be seriously deep-diving into all of this during our upcoming Sacred Sexuality & Tantric Pilgrimage to India taking place in November of 2024 - stay tuned for more info about that and subscribe to my email list to get all the details as soon as they are available. Spaces will be quite limited (and two are already filled!), as this will be a very small, deeply personalized sacred container for our sexual evolution, spiritual growth and transformation. I can hardly wait to share more about that!

Thank you again my beautiful beloveds. What a gorgeous adventure of awakening we are on! So grateful for your connection, your energy, and your presence! So grateful to be exploring our Sacred Sexuality together!

Wishing you much love, joy, ease, pleasure, and freedom on your journey!

XoXo ~ Star

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Nov 18, 2023

I have settled on calling it the I AM, heavily influenced by writers like Neville Goddard and Florence Scoville Shinn. And using that term always brings me back to the meaning behind the word "God"

Nov 18, 2023
Replying to

Yes! Thank you for sharing this. Very powerful and seriously brings it all home, doesn't it? It is a constant remembering and returning back to the Truth. I AM cuts right through it all and totally interrupts my thought-processes. Thank you again for this! I appreciate your responding! XoXo ~ Star

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